Open Brain, Insert Foot

Hi. My name is Emma, and I am a Bond-snob.

Having been a Pierce Brosnan fan since his Remington Steele days, I took the loss of him as Bond personally. So when it was announced a blond-haired, blue-eyed Bond had usurped him, I, as did many others, turned my nose up and vowed never to watch another Bond film.

Naturally, I didn’t see the latest installment in theaters, and I will admit this right up front: the only reason I bought Casino Royale was so I could feel good about my powers of prediction. I wanted to rubberneck the train wreck and gloat while watching Daniel Craig, along with the entire production team, fall flat on their faces for making such a blasphemous choice.

Normally I’d run a self-check for being utterly petty and ridiculous, approaching anything with such a stank, shrewish attitude. But as I said, silly as it may seem, I took this personally. And I distinctly remember watching Die Another Day, wildly applauding the surprise appearance of some character development (thank you, Pierce, even though you weren’t credited) and saying out loud, “There is no way on earth they will ever top this.”


I was wrong. Dead wrong. So wrong, I had to publically eat some crow in penitence.

Before I dish up, let me say the Bond franchise doesn’t put on airs. They know they’re entertainment-only, and don’t pretend to be anything else. Coming into this film, the writers and Daniel had a steep row to hoe. Not only had they finally obtained the rights to the book that started it all, but they had to prove Mr. Craig a worthy replacement for Pierce.

I do have to say at first, I thought I was about to be proven right. The post-scene-zero close ups of Daniel Craig bear an unfortuante resemblance to Dr. Evil. And the opening action sequences were burnt, with one extremely notable exception: the freerun stunt work by Sebastian Foucan. A jaw-dropping bit of athleticism there, and to be honest, I forgot all about Daniel Craig watching Foucan.

And then… Mr Craig sits for his first card game with Dmitrios, and there I fell. Just a little.

I was head over heels by the time he sat down in the shower next to Vesper.

Un momentito, por favor. Let me swallow. It’s impolite to blog with a mouth full of crow.

All right. It’s not often that pettiness is rewarded, but I gotta give credit where it’s due. Daniel Craig, enjoy your run. You’re marvellous, and I must thank you for being an exceptionally good sport. And holy lord are you ever cut. Wow.

With that painful admission out of the way, I’m going to be careful not to give any spoilers while I run through some general impressions:

Craig might have been great, but the film itself had some problems. They made an enormous mistake at the end, but let me ask you this…

When was the last time you cried during a Bond film?

Don’t think that’s possible? I dare you to remain unaffected, witnessing the genesis of a character whose traits we all know inside and out. This installment, we learn where those traits came from. When he’s talking to M on the phone afterwards and he uses the B word, I was wrecked.

The birth of the dinner jacket was great, as was the martini. Of course, the whole time I was wondering how they’d ever recover from the way they slipped ‘money-penny’ in there. There was a notable absence of Q, but Dame Judy was brilliant as ever.

And while we’re at it, if I were Eva Green, I would personally slap the costume designer for that monstrous purple dress. When she’s finished with that, I’d advise her to visit the hair trailer and knock some heads, paying especially close attention to the colorist. Afterwards, she can lead me to the makeup department because I’d like to have a word or two.

On the other hand, I want Caterina Murina’s haircut for myself to keep for always. And that coralish-colored dress was absolutely gorgeous. Well, the color was gorgeous. The big Converse All Stars Lace in the back, not so much. But whatever.

All right. I’m done rambling. The point is, if you’re a Bondsnob like me, open your mind a bit and give Mr. Craig a try. He and Pierce are apples to oranges, and I think we have a lot to look forward to in future.


3 Responses

  1. Tsk Tsk. Now if you’d listened to me on the Daniel Craig front, you’d have been spared all that painful hubris and icky crow….. 😉

    Wasn’t it… fabulous? :teef:

  2. Yes, yes it was. I’m still annoyed about the password/keypad error and the redemption bit, but I get over it quickly every time he says, “Give him a chance to win his money back.”


  3. Thank You

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